I have a little time off from school and thought I might as well use some of that free time for something constructive. Like hating on a few idiots.
I'll start with Stefano Gabbana. Look at what he said: "I am opposed to the idea of a child growing up with two gay parents. A child needs a mother and a father. I could not imagine my childhood without my mother. I also believe that it is cruel to take a baby away from its mother." [via Towle]
I am just livid. First of all, he is wrong on his account of gays as parents. You can check out many positive references for gay parenting in the comments to this great post by Seattle's Dan Savage (the post is about Mary Cheney's pregnancy, I saw it first on Joe). Children raised by gay parents are just as good as the children raised by straight parents.
So, my best bet for a comment like the one from Stefano Gabbana is that he thinks he is himself a bad person and will be a bad father, and newsflash to Stefano: this will happen whether you try to have a kid with a man or a woman. Even worse, he probably thinks that by having a kid with a woman he can still say he is a father (and try to ooze responsibility, maybe?), while avoiding real parental duties. He will probably be able to dump the kid on the woman, like a straight jerk would.
The other possibilities I can think of are all just as bad. He may just be dumb and inconsequent. We see examples of that dangerous combination everyday. Do I need to name names?
Also, Stefano may just be a self-hating gay, and we know there are many of those out there. You would think that self-hate would not exist in an out gay man, because the out gay man does not have to lie about who he is, does not have to marry a girl, make people suffer etc. Out gay men tend to live around other gays and see that we are normal people. Something that would prevent an idiotic comment like the one from Stefano. So, if Stefano is a self-hater we come to the conclusion above, if he is not a self-hater, we are lead to the conclusion that the gays surrounding Stefano Gabbana left him with the worst impression of the gays. That would be the reason why he thinks gays should not be parents, because he has a poor, negative bias towards the gays due to his bad and limited experience.
As I have done before, I invite you to lay out your reason for a statement like that of Stefano. I'll probably believe it.
Now let's get down to business. Recently, we have seen haters apologize left and right. Mel Gibson did it - note though that I have seen apologies for his anti-Semitic remarks, but not for his homophobic remarks, which are older and just as nasty. Michael Richards is doing it. Jennifer Hudson tried it, but unsuccessfully I think. I applaud the apologies. They are needed. But, alone, they are far from enough. They are not enough because they need to be credible, and to me credibility would only attach when those haters donate money, serious 7-figure money, to organizations that seek to diminish and prevent the hate they disseminated.
To get back to the Stefano Gabbana case, I must say I will only consider even looking into anything Dolce & Gabbana after Stefano (i) apologizes to the gays in general and to all gay parents and kids of gay parents in particular, and (ii) donates handsomely to organizations like PFLAG.
Gays, we need to wise up and care about these things. Statements like the one from Stefano hurt our rights. You may think you do not need equal rights now, but you may fall in love, you may want a kid and you might very well suffer without the rights we need to fight for now.
Addresses and a phone number for Dolce & Gabbana after the jump (the info was provided by a commenter over at Towle).